The Land of No Return

I stumbled across an old Henry Park Primary publication as I was rummaging through a cabinet of old stuff this weekend.  It was a thematic collection of essays from the Primary 4, 5 and 6 classes to commemorate my alma mater’s then-15th anniversary which fell on 11 April 1992.  I was 10 years old. Two of my essays made it to the book, more likely rewards for my wild flights of imagination rather than a celebration of my command of English.  I was a very homely kid who would spend most of my time daydreaming after countless hours with gamebooks from the Way of the Tiger, Blood Sword and Lone Wolf series. It was cool to find my old crap, so I thought I’d republish one of my essays and subject all of you to some pain ;-).

In the year 1000 B.C., there was an adventurous man named Charles Dickens Walter.  He decided to explore the island named “The Land of No Return”.  He took one month’s ration, a sword, some arrows and daggers with him.  Wearing a chain mail armour, he set sail on his journey.

While Charles was at sea, he was caught in a storm.  He was cast ashore on the island “The Land of No Return”.  He lay on the beach and slept for three days and three nights.  When Charles woke up, he was surrounded by a swarm of giant bees with needles on their back.  Charles took out his sword and started slicing the bees.

After a long and bitter fight, all the bees were dead.  Charles was stung four times.  It was very painful, but he bore with it.  Suddenly, all the bees disappeared.  Charles then realised that he had been tricked by an illusion.  He saw a cave in front of him.  As there was no other passage, he entered the cave.

After Charles took ten steps into the cave, a door closed behind him.  He took a dagger and threw it at the door.  It stopped the door from closing completely.

Suddenly, a flash of light appeared in front of him.  He saw a creature, or rather a monster called Zanius.  It looked scary with its scaly head and spiky body.  Charles took another dagger and aimed at its heart.  It missed!  The monster jumped down from the stairs and clawed Charles.  Charles dodged and missed the sharp claws of the monster.  He took an arrow and aimed again.  It flew straight into the monster’s heart!  The monster was dead at last.  Charles walked up the stairs and came to another door.

“Aargh!!!” Charles was hit on the arm by an arrow.  But almost immediately, he threw a dagger at the goblin which fired the arrow.  It hit his head and screams were heard.  From Charles’ left appeared some cobramen.  Charles fired four arrows which hit all of them.

“Stop!”, a sound was heard near Charles.  He turned round and saw an evil magician.  He cast a spell on Charles, which was called “Volcano Spray”.  Charles tried to stop it by firing three arrows.  Two hit the magician and he groaned.  The spell was then broken.

Charles fired three arrows but the magician made a shield spell to protect himself.  This time, Charles fired two more arrows and they hit the magician right on the head.  He fell dead on the ground.  The body disappeared and a sword called “Lightning Sword” lay on the ground.  When Charles took the sword, a trapdoor opened under him and he fell into it.  It led him back to shore.  So Charles went back by his boat.

When he reached home, he was greeted by the mayor and the people of that town.  Charles’ wife gave Charles a kiss and his children hugged him.  The mayor gave Charles two thousand gold crowns as a reward for killing the evil magician and getting the Lightning Sword back to its rightful place.  Charles and his family lived happily ever after.

It may have been 18 years since, but I never cease to cringe each time I read this essay of mine, heh.

Front cover of the Henry Park Primary School publication

About James Chan

James Chan is an entrepreneur, investor, geek, photographer and husband/father based out of Singapore. Apart from frequent travels to Vietnam, Myanmar and Indonesia for work, James can also be found online via his trusty 15" Retina MacBook Pro or iPhone 6+.